As they reap, so shall they sow

The American Progressive Front for Justice in Gaza has roundly condemned US Republican candidate Ronald Trumpeter for his “brazen and unwarranted attack on Barack Obama, and the President’s policy of defending Israel”

Branding Trumpeter’s attack “an archetypal KKK view of African Americans”, APFJIG spokesperson Ivy-Leigh Gliberal added, “it is an affront to me and all my fellow supporters of Arab liberation from the imperialist jackboot of Zionist expansionism that this crypto-renegade billionaire should try to steal our jobs. This is typical of the neoliberal mentality in wanting to have it both ways by criticising both well-meaning if misguided ethnic American foreign policy and the unforgivably bestial Netanyahu administration’s genocidal intentions at one and the same time. This whole facade is designed to keep ordinary voters like me completely muddled, but we are smarter than he thinks”.

“As they reap, so shall they sow,” observed Zeke Cornstalk, ordinary voter and lawyer of Hutchinson, Kansas.

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EUNATO’s Chief of Armed Liberty Liberation Fuertorica Smokeascreena broke down today as she described the carnage wrought by followers of the Freedom Fighting McCain anti-Assad Rebels in Brussels, a city of great emotional importance to her cos datta where de power is bambina, cappiche?

Several US State Department officials rushed to repair the Italian’s tear ducts, succeeding to the extent that Signora Smokerscreena became incontinento in flagrante alla Bollocknese within seconds, and had to be led away for a respray back in make-up.

Tonight, thousands of Germans are carrying shopping bags with the slogan ‘Ich bin ein Plucky Belgian’ emblazoned on the side. UK Labour supporters have also been sighted near Sloane Square in London (by social trends guru Peter Gawk) sporting teeshirts proclaiming ‘Next hen-night in Brussels, Ya?’

“As they reap, so shall they sow,” remarked a half-starved, Greek aid worker and Mum as she breast-fed an orphaned Syrian baby.

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News is coming in on a daily basis of an explosion in trauma cases within the ranks of Britain’s police force. Indeed, the situation is serious enough to have reached a Deputy Assistant Undertypist in the Home Office temporary prefab annexe based in Croydon.

“It is spiralling upwards into freefall,” a zero hours contract trainee sicko-catcher told me, “and will without doubt become a black vortex of critical vertigo unless something is done soon”.

The Slog has established via the medium of used untraceable Tenners that the problem for junior police officers is one of Generally Evasive Senior Toady Arselicka  Politician Overload, or Gestapo for short.

“The ordinary bobby” commented Minority Press Relations Outreach Coordinator Wrightson Yorenicht, “no longer knows whether he is a racist brutal organ of the State, a Motorway-speeding tax collector, a homophiliac feminist serial-rape investigative Newscorp employee, a ruthless water-cannon riot cop, a foiler of Islamist suicidal shoe-bombers, a seeker after pacifist extremists, or simply Dixon of Nock Green Dick like what Jack Warner used to play on black and white telly”.

Sergeant Yorenicht unfortunately then left the interview hurriedly, having been called to the home of a Sky News enthusiast who had dialled 999 after watching a report from Belgium.

“As they reap, so shall they sow,” said an NVE crime suspect as I left the police station, proceedin’ hin a Westerly direction. Now that our police have lost the plot, one meets a much nicer class of person down the copshop.

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Earlier at The Slog: The State Pension cynicism of Osborne of the Night