Obama against Romney: Butterfingers v Sticky fingers

Americans must choose: do they want an incompetent gamekeeper, or an inveterate poacher?

The President in Office is Barack Obama. This is a brief resumé of his First Term:

1. Repeated signs of economic and fiscal illiteracy

2. Ignorant on Europe and chilly towards the traditionally reliable US ally, Great Britain

3. Pushes through a Public Health Bill during the worst deficit in American history

4. Fails to regulate Wall Street, or bring serious felons to justice

5. Obfuscates and dissembles about the American economy, and then gets found out

6. Fails to exert any influence over the collapse of the eurozone

7. Reaches out to Islam, and gets a spit in the face for his trouble

8. Introduces a Mortgage Relief Bill that costs billions and achieves zilch

9. Fails to use status as President to end deficit wrangle in Congress

10. Takes naive view of Arab Middle East rebellions.

The Republican challenger is Mitt Romney. These are his credentials for restoring American wellbeing:

1. Achieves support for his first Wealth Fund from international fraudster Robert Maxwell, San Salvadorean drug families, and Guinness booze perjurer

2. Makes $100m profit from buying and floating Ampad, 1992-96, during which period the company sees 53% compound growth. Ampad then ‘sees profit fall-off’, sues for bankruptcy in 2001. Investors lose their shirts.

3. 1993, Romney aquires Armco, plant closes 2003, all workers lose their jobs, creditors lose $553m….but somehow Romney’s Bain declares $58.4m profit, alongside a $44m hole in the Company pension fund. (Very Maxwell, that one)

4. In some 30% of all Bain deals, Romney moves jobs offshore, thus adding to US unemployment

5. By the time Romney leaves Bain to run 2002 Winter Olympics, it is revealed by SEC that he is 100% shareholder. Takes little role in running Bain but keeps all the action for himself.

6. In 2007, Howard Anderson, a professor at M.I.T.’s Sloan School of Management, tells the Boston Globe “Bain Capital is the model of how to leverage brain power to make money.”  Cites closure of factories, elimination of jobs, use of tax-sheltered offshore accounts, and driving the companies it had bought into bankruptcy as the key factors defining Bain Strategy. (Pure Gordon Gecko)

7. Attacks Tim Geithner for tax avoidance, but keeps most of his fortune in offshore tax havens

8. During 2011 candidature run-in, steadfastly refuses to release any data on his tax affairs from before 2010

9. Staunch Republican Rick Perry observes “something inherently wrong when getting rich off failure and sticking it to someone else” are Romney’s modus operandi.

10. Vows to restore Special Relationship, visits London and predicts Brits might cock up the entire Olympic Games event.

So there you have it America: it’s a guy who promises to do something good, and then does nothing at all; or a guy who promises he’ll put things right in the future, having done all the wrong things in the past.

Seems to me it’s a clear choice. That’s democracy, my friends. So don’t waste your vote by casting it.

Vaguely connected: How the Olympics opening ceremony ploughed the furrow of Hitler and Beijing

69 thoughts on “Obama against Romney: Butterfingers v Sticky fingers

  1. America should have remained a colony. Then the great complaint would be the traditional Etonian virtue. Complete self con fidence and total incompetence…But lovely manners


  2. Thank you JW, it’s good to know that the Yanks have a similar type of choice to us; incompetent, innumerate and corrupt socialism or slightly competent (in its own interest) but wholly selfish, elitist and self-centred capitalism. What we need is Tony Blair with his third way. Oh, sorry, perhaps not. In fact definitely not!!

    Trouble is, getting a better way forward requires changing the voting system quite radically, and that tends to let in other kinds of crank. For example, the LibDems, an intellect-free zone if ever there was. Both countries are cursed, but it could be worse – imagine the slick and slippery Francois Hollande getting together with our very own Mark Serwotka in some sort of EU council.


  3. It does not really matter who is elected POTUS. Obama and Romney are both bought and paid for by Wall St. It will be business as usual by the real power Goldman Sachs.


  4. I thought I read somewhere that MR was a Mormon – from JW’s summary seems he is a true believer in Mammon.

    Meanwhile on t’other side of the World, our Dear Leader has got married to one Ri-sol ju. Her name sounds a bit like one of Sandy’sview culinary concoctions. Perhaps Old Asia Hand can tell us is she is indeed a saucy minx?


  5. The Mormons are some of the most successful businessmen in the US. They own or owned United Airlines, CBS and Marriott corporation. As with most businessmen they are the most incredibly boring sanctimonious people. My old classmate Mark Skousen, hard money man and ex CIA, is one. Very influential in Congress. Punch well above their weight.

    With regards Madame Kim, you got me. Korean ladies are very attractive till they open their mouths and breathe garlic breath (or kim chee) on you. Oh well, nobody’s perfect! korea is an excellent choice for a young man wanting to teach English. Lots of free benefits.


  6. Whoever gets the nod will have the honour of being the president that leads America over the fiscal cliff and into total chaos.

    I’m hoping it’ll be Barry though. He’s a total turd and about as representative of black people as a KKK member. It’ll be nice for him to go down in history as the most incompetent empty suit that ever lived. He threw the most petrol on the fire in the last four years so it’s fitting that he should get to burn in it.

    And in my usual Friday message to the CIA message board spooks: I hope you get food poisoning and spend the weekend on the toilet passing pint after pint of boiling hot s**t.


  7. No contest. Stick with Benito rather than changing to Adolf. Obama has done as well as could be expected on the economy. He has been appalling on civil liberties but is getting us out of Iraq and Afghanistan and has not yet supported a nuclear strike on Iran. I fully endorse his coolness to us. I just wish we would reciprocate rather than getting out the KY.

    Romney would be Bush redux. No thanks!


  8. @ Chris, Theres never an assasin for good causes around when you need one. Excellent wholeheartedly agreeable sentiments all the same!


  9. As always, the choice of the electorate can be boiled down to a simple idea:

    Which fart would you prefer to smell?


  10. HOPE: Hopeless Oppositionists’ Presidential Election
    CHANGE: Just another ‘Corrupted Hope And NO Change Election’


  11. Well, “People get the governments they deserve” according to Thomas Jefferson’s famous quote

    Surely a great nation like America deserves better than these two schmucks?

    Have the likes of the Roosevelts, Truemans and Eisenhowers gone for ever from the US political scene?

    Certainly looks that way at the moment


  12. Chris………I’ll pass your message on to the spooks that might have missed it, however I imagine that they will tell me it sounds like a normal weekend in Beirut in the 80’s to them.


  13. It certainly seems that way at the moment, on a global scale. All we have to pick from are retards and crooks.

    Hence the reason I refuse to vote. It’s as much of a good use of my electoral rights as actually ticking a box for douchebag a) or b).

    Unfortunately this hope vacuum is ripe for exploitation by extremist candidates. That’s how hitler got the job and it’s not outside the realms of possibility that the next political strongman/genocidal maniac is around the next corner.


  14. Blackadder50……..sadly the US has changed and we are no longer a great nation but one in decline. It seems that most are waiting for the next unfunded government program to save them poverty. Today we are more like Greece than the country we once were under the Presidents mentioned.


  15. @Maxter,, I live on the same planet with the rest of you, I just don’t get down in the gutter with today’s crazy lot of insane OPINIONS… let’s see just ONE of these wild tirades against either man DOCUMENTED.. Is that just Too Much to ask?? PS Watson wasn’t a Mormon, I looked up his obit in about 5 seconds!!


  16. The comments about Obama are ludicrous. His major mistake was in ignoring advice that a bigger stimulus was needed. Reforming healthcare was and is essential if the US budget deficit is to be brought under control.


  17. @maxter …..Nice site, I’m thinking about getting the Cambodian passport it should be quite safe over there after the global financial melt down.


  18. Fractionally Off Topic, but for those following Sandy Weill’s reversal on Glass-Steagull, it came as a surprise to me to find this New York Times editorial today wherein the editors admit to their paper lobbying for its repeal in the eighties and nineties:


    But now they’ve changed their minds, like Sandy.

    Nearly my second coronary of the day, but had managed, by the time I read the above, to calm down after the cable TV bill arrived and caused me to feel as though I was going in eight different directions at once, none of them pleasant. $75 taxes and fees before one scintilla of content. Per month.


  19. @ james c………..How was healthcare reformed? If you add millions to the same system with the same number of doctors and nurses how does that improve heath care? Perhaps we should fund new medical schools before we add new patients. Any system, single payer or fee based will not be able to handle the influx of additional people without first increasing the staff. I can see that in the future I will have to join a plan that provides a ” concierge doctor” to see a medical professional quickly.


  20. Lol how big a stimulus? What was it $787 billion? and I’ve lost count of how many hundreds of billions of qe, what exactly has to happen for people to realise it’s not the answer?


  21. Chris
    And outstanding thread, and may I just add that their eyes and ears should be boiled in front of their families, Amen.


  22. Liebe Merkwurd
    He iss also vonting ze very big bust of Geli Murkel in hiss Offal Orifice, did you not know zat his name is von Rommel anglicised? Ja, es ist wahr!
    Mittbrain would say anything in order to get everything.


  23. Chris
    We need to start the antidote to political Parties. I thought we could call it ‘I’m sorry I haven’t a Clue’.


  24. David
    Rastaman has just been consigned to Room 101. He’s had more than enough warnings. Others should beware: if you don’t like it here, then I will use my Troll-free number to vapourise you. Ho-ho-ho.


  25. Rastaman
    You won’t find anything in Watson’s obitutary, but it is obvious your mind is a seething tributary of bollocks. You are history, by-eee.


  26. It’s the cool black dude for me. Least likely to go to war, most likely to try to look after the US.
    And no, I don’t care if he’s not too keen on the UK. In fact when he was at the dinner with the Queen, (Royal wedding, some other nonsense?-I forget)I’m sure he almost burst out laughing at the Ruritanian pretence of it-who could blame him?


  27. Crikey-you must be a bit hacked off today. Hope things are generally ok. It being Friday, a nice merlot goes down well-mine already has.


  28. BTW why is the “reply” thing ending up a normal comment rather than a reply? Ha-technology-great when it works.


  29. O/T But harking back to a comment by me and discussion on Syrian WMD:

    In a more recent paper published in 2006 in the International Journal of Intelligence and Counter-Intelligence , An Antithesis on the Fate of Iraq’s Chemical and Biological Weapons, Dr Shoham wrote that the two official reports – Duelfer and Carnegie in 2004 – that supposedly exonerated Saddam of still having WMD by the outbreak of war ignored much information that indicated the smuggling of chemical and biological weapons from Iraq into Syria. Although the most knowledgeable and experienced individuals tracking Iraq’s WMD were members of UNSCOM, they were largely excluded by the US intelligence community. Ill-trained soldiers would go to a site, find something suspicious, return 48 hours later and find it had disappeared.
    In October 2003, the US intelligence community publicly pointed for the first time to transfers of WMD from Iraq to Syria. The Director of the National Imagery and Mapping Agency, James Clapper, said it linked the disappearance of Iraqi WMD with the huge number of Iraqi trucks entering Syria before and during the US invasion; based on satellite imagery, it assessed that these trucks contained missiles and WMD components. Shipments to Syria were supervised by Saddam’s most loyal intelligence agents. Once the shipments were made, these agents would leave and the regular border guards resumed their posts.
    Moreover, captured Iraqi documents record that the Russian ‘spetsnaz’ moved many of Saddam’s weapons and related goods, including chemicals used to make chemical weapons plus missile components and MIG jet parts, out of Iraq and into Syria in the weeks before the 2003 invasion.



  30. Exactly Mick C

    But which is more and worse Mick C?

    The pretence that one American Multi-millionaire can buy the presidency, or that QE2 acts in all our best interests?

    After all if QE2 had been doing her job properly, there are at least a dozen parliamentary bills she should and could have vetoed…

    Never mind suspending parliament…

    As for our American ‘Cousins’ well as the ethnic minorities grow in influence, expect them to become less ‘Euro-centric’ and less friendly to our interests, Barack Obama, is but a portent of what is to come…

    Anyone else who thinks otherwise is deluding themselves..

    Wait for the re-run of Malvinas 2, as the acid test…


  31. ‘Debt crisis: Angela Merkel and Francois Hollande pledge to back euro
    Angela Merkel and François Hollande pledged on Friday “to do everything to protect” the European Union’s single currency, papering over deep divisions between them over how to tackle the Spanish and Italian debt crisis. ‘
    Thought she was on holiday…….


  32. It was only the personal relationship of Thatcher and Reagan (and the Cold War) which got us US help last time-no chance this time. And let’s face it, the first time was a cock-up by Thatcher which just happened to work in her favour.
    If there’s no oil there, the Falklands are worthless (we no longer need coaling stations!)-but if there is the US will just want stability (not to mention covert control). The UK is more stable than Argentina (exam question-discuss in no more than 2000 words!) so they might go for us-who knows?
    Personally, I doubt if economic oil can be got even if it is there. Once Argentina has a half sensible leader, negotiations should begin along the lines of a lease back. After all, Scotland has just as good islands!


  33. I once encountered a theory that the President of the United States of America is such a crap job that only a fool or a madman would do it.
    I suppose that summons up the political mindset quite well.


  34. Sounds good John, can we start on
    Monday though? Its been a long week.

    And we need a neutral colour for any new political movement, otherwise folks will think we’re Tory or a socialist, or worse, damned neutrals!


  35. It seems to me that the Slog’s opinion is about the same as garlic breath. Why don’t you fix Europe? As for the health plan, it ain’t great but much better than what we have had (really starts in 2014). If Romney gets elected it will be the takeover of the elites while unfortunately there are enough stupid people that it might happen.


  36. reaching out to islam? he’s been hammering islam into a democratic shape that can even stretch to allow the cia to sub-contract work out to al qaeda.

    as for larry the liquidator, maybe he’s just the guy the americans need right now?


  37. Just a thought, the Government threatens to take the border control staff to court because the mandate for strike action was less then 40% of Union Membership.

    The last election less then 40% of electors bothered to vote, i believe that Tories had 40% Labour 35% and Liberals 20% of votes cast. Or put another way 60% did not want Lab/Tory/Lib so the election should have been null and void.

    Thenagain the politicos make up the rules


  38. Pingback: Bollocks: the triumph of the objectionable over the objective | A diary of deception and distortion

  39. Pingback: John Ward – Bollocks : The Triumph Of The Objectionable Over The Objective – 31 August 2012 | Lucas 2012 Infos

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