mesnip30716In what will be a regular feature at The Slog from now on, I’ll be highlighting any and all sightings of Twatters – those daily invaders of Twitter with a very distinctive insistence on telling half a story – while ignoring the laws of logic, the realities of scientific investigation, and the feelings of others.



The far the most numerous of the many twattering classes at the moment are those who inhabit the global anti-Brexit tribe. It is as if – following what for them has been the cataclysmic end of the future, the vote for the UK to leave the EU – there is but one aim in their compulsive lives: to blame everything bad on Brexit, and every scumfascistbigotracist who voted for it. I choose the example below because, on almost every level, it is round the bend.


The photo is unique in its irrelevance: it’s neither in Europe nor Great Britain, but it looks pretty run down and desperate, so it fits the bill. Then the caption: ‘EU trade policy is in limbo’: EU trade has been the slow drudge of the Living Undead since early 2014. Then the use of ‘at least one’ to describe the one (yes, that’s 1, although we’re not told which one) trade deal that’s on ice; and finally, others may follow. Or not.

Meanwhile little, brittle Britain – that’s the one cast adrift with no hope of success – has turned in the best trade and unemployment figures for over two years….and is growing much faster than either the EU or the eurozone. OK; I do think it’s all built on sand – but then it has been since around 1995…along with the rest of the world. And it’s far too early to tell.

This stuff is risible, childish and pernicious.


I choose this Stella Creasy bit from Labour List next, because it illustrates two ways in which Twitter is slowly using the Labour Party’s own twitching hands to kill it.

First up, like anyone else with a heart I feel sorry for displaced people and traumatised kids. But the behaviour of their parents leaves, in many cases, a great deal to be desired. Perhaps you don’t see as much about Calais in England as I do here in France. The place is like Gomorrah overlaid onto 1850s Abilene at the moment: the police have lost control, and many adults roam at will, harassing locals and arrivals with relative impunity.

Second, why Calais? You would have to have been blind and deaf over the last year not to notice that, after Hungary, the UK is the most anti further immigration State in the EU. The migrants (or refugees or whatever, who the hell knows any more?) fancy Britain as their destination because there’s work there and an unregulated employment market.

Third, the overwhelming majority of them are Islamic, and we have three fifths of no idea at all about where their loyalties lie.

Next, why children? Why are kids shown by pro-Islamic, anti-Israel propagandists who want to hard-sell their distorted wares? Because it tugs the heart strings: but it’s dishonest, callous and cynical.

Now Ms Creasy (who I’m sure means well) wants to lobby for more measures to ‘stop’ the suffering of children in Calais. How? They won’t go away of their own accord: the adult migrants have no hope of gaining sanctuary en masse in the UK, but they brought their children. That was smart.

Does she, I wonder, ever read the psephology of elections and why the Remain campaign lost?

The Remaindeers lost because core Labour loyalists in the Party’s heartlands left in droves to support UKIP on a simple but generally rational policy plank: let’s solve the prosperity and housing problems of the inhabitants we have now before letting any more in.

Stella is wringing her heart out on that damp sleeve, but youth unemployment, affordable property and pensioner destitution are very serious problems for the indigenous population. It is the duty of every ‘national’ Government to put those citizens first.

Labour’s long-standing internationalist strain is holding it back; but setting it aside does not require a change of commitment to the underdog. And the Labour activist’s insane auto-connect between immigration and racism remains its biggest millstone….even though, in my experience, immigration hasn’t been a race issue for most Brits since the early 1970s.

The last study six years ago showed 78% of all Brits of all ethnicities wanted an immediate end to all immigration. While ignoring this reality, the Left is busily trying to elect the faceless technocrat Owen Smith as its leader.

The degree of muddle beggars belief.


I put the above bit of cobblers in as a demonstration in 3-D technicolor of just how little discernment, knowledge, and detection skills most of the 48% have. If this nitwit can’t see the politicised and geographically irrelevant nature of the notice, there’s not much point in me doing the teach-a-pig-to-sing shtick.

Let’s move on instead to someone who should know better, but is already emerging as probably the most dangerous woman in Britain now that Harriet Harman has retired to count her Unite, Commons and State pensions.


What I think Mother Theresa has got wrong here is the order of mirror, signal and maneouvre when launching herself at social media. I think a better order of play would’ve been this one:

  1. Launch a genuine crackdown on all multinational tax avoidance, and associated senior employee tax havens
  2. Bring in an emergency budget offering 0% ‘patient’, unsecured loans to SMEs with a sound business idea or expansion aim…and force taxpayer owned banks to do it
  3. Tweet about her vision for a more communitarian capitalist Britain.

But as it is, she hasn’t got a clue what to do or how to go about it, so Theresa Mayfly stuck out a daft tweet trying to look as if she has this problem under control.

Things are obviously now completely out of control at the Independent, whose masthead title looks as if, these days, it might mean that the only thing the paper has become independent of is the surface of the planet. The interns writing the daily stream of invented codswallop that now appears in virtual form only have at least cottoned on to what ‘virtual’ actually means: not real.

The Indie Monkeys are big on surges: everything every day in every way is a surge. But not one scintilla of it on any day checks out in any way whatsoever. Thus we get:


My reply will suffice to keep your suffering to a bearable minimum. It’s just such a dreadful outcome for what was, at the outset, the best thing to happen to Fleet Street in decades.

And finally, the man who would never win a primary and never get the GOP nomination is now the clown who will never beat Hillary Billary.


It’s a funny old world, is it not? Although the US media are doing everything in their power to ignore the huge crowds flocking to Trump’s stumps, it seems that since the Democratic Convention, Donald the Chump has made up almost all the ground he lost.

And Mrs Billary is still fighting off revelations on three separate levels to suggest that she really is a major-league asshole shagging the Pentagon, the State Department and Wall Street in a unique ménage a quatre.

As Trump is the only candidate who is even likely to challenge America’s mad élite, were I American I would vote for him. It’s just that old scumfascistbigotracist in me screaming to get out. That, and the fear of Mrs Clinton dancing the seven veils all the way into World War III.

At the weekend Slog: Why Brexit geopolitics are still in the ascendancy