Late Flash: terrorist civil war in Westminster, no global ideologies or moguls among the dead

In another sign that Wolfgang Schäuble’s Long Term Economic Austerity is working, the Greek stock market has been relegated from the FTSE‘s “developed” markets sector to that of “advanced emerging markets”.

It’s hard to tell from my standpoint what exactly it is that the FTSE pointy-heads think Greece is emerging from….or indeed why any descriptor suggesting a ‘rise’ is being employed here. My first thought would be that Greece has emerged from being backhandered and embezzled to death by a home grown-élite, so that it could be debted up and then taxed to death by a foreign élite. Or – on second thoughts – it has emerged from being an EU State with a deficit problem to being a feudal vassal of Brussels-am-Bankfurt;

Whichever of these two suits your book, Greece is not an emerging market, it’s a submerged State. This will continue around the world until (a) the media stop parroting and start questioning, (b) the Smuggy sector below the 3% MoU élites stops being on the make and starts getting on the case, and (c) the Left stops examining its haemarrhoids, and has a real go at engaging with others in the Resistance.

But we’re going over old ground. In other news today, Goldman Sachs is now officially under investigation for suspected rigging of the US T-Bills market. Sorry, that too is old ground. In other news today, Iain Dunkin-Donut’s replacement as Welfare Secretary is to be Stephen Crabb, an MP who used public money to more than treble the value of his London apartment, and then voted to cut sick and disabled welfare support by £30 a week. Sorry, lots of old ground news coming through here….could this mean the ground we’re all fighting on hasn’t changed at all…despite all those Disarray Meltdown headlines over the weekend.

So let’s turn to the eurozone for new news and look at this chart about negative rates and bank lending….

ezonelending21316…..on the subject of which Mario Draghi told investors the week before last that “we have had some very encouraging lending results from employing negative rates”. Well, he lied: the net uplift in eurozone lending during the eight month experiment – using the ECB’s own figures – has been exactly 0.2%. So I’m afraid here too we’re watching old news develop, rather than seeing new-news happen. Draghi lies Again: it sounds like a 1940s Western starring James Stewart. ‘Now with digitally remastered lies fit for the 21st century’.

So let’s head back to Blighty and check that, with the Tories in disarray, there might be some NHS new-news like “All Party Committee votes to Mutualise NHS & protect it from Whitehall and Markets”. And yes…we have developing news.

Remember those Tweets last week from the Secretary for the State the NHS is In, Jeremy Taiping-Errah? You know, the ones about “a £10bn boost for the NHS”? Well, both he Osbollocks lied: the BMA’s analysis shows that the boost is under half that amount, and will be spent over the next five years.

cunt       osbollocks14316 Jeremy Lies Again. Georgie Porgie pudding and pied again. Nope, it’s still old news.

And finally, February 2016 was the hottest on record. It’s growing proof of global warming, perhaps. That’s new news. But not really: the same source last August said January-March would bring the coldest European winter since the Middle Ages. So the weather/climate disconnect continues. Old, old news. And perr-leeeeeeze, no more f**king threads about the difference between the two. That’s beyond old news: it’s old hat, ancient history, and the maths of those who can’t see that 5000 weathers = a climate.

But it’s a new working work. Tomorrow is another day. We’ll cross to the sunny side of the street. The Shanghai Index is back above 3000. Beijing can afford to keep this miracle going until its foreign reserves run out. Some time in July.

Let joy be uncontained: legalise droit de seigneur. Dubai has introduced the World’s First Drone Grand Prix race. The human race is cured.

Yesterday at The Slog: The UK’s unique Troika of civil wars