EXCLUSIVE: The Slog Old Year Donor’s List leaks

2015

In the boggy slime of the 2015 Gong Show, here’s a few you may have missed….

For her stoicism in the face of being played by Barbara Windsor for twenty years, Peggatha Mitchell becomes Dame Peggay of Krayborough.

Sue Barker becomes an OBE in recognition of her perseverance in barking up the wrong tree over many years with Sir Cliff Richard.

Lynton Crosby is to receive a knighthood for services to ventriloquism, and Grant Shapps scoops the Best Supporting Actor Award for his role as the dummy.

Sir Anthony Swynging-Dique becomes Lady Uppercut in recognition of her services to medical research.

First Lord of the Flies Jeremy Nettlebotham is made Robin Prince of Thieves for his services to the Health Insurance sector.

Donovan Askme – who runs the Happy Eater Kwikservice at Barnsley South Services (Tory gain) – gets the BSE for his services to motorway services hygiene services.

Tory MP Appelby Thadaye is awarded the Distinguished Service Order for his services to recreational services supplied to Downing Street financial services through his organ, the Hongtoot & Sniffhigh Banking Cokoperation (HSBC).

Democratic reforming Sultan Recep Erdogun becomes an Arabian Night of the Order of Saladdin by day, and an order-taker of the Islamic State Black Knights by night, in recognition of his services to the Syrian Undertaker sector over many years.

 

May your 2016 be as free as possible from awards, frauds, Lords, and swords as possible.

My heartfelt thanks go out to those who get WTF I’m on about….as indeed I express my profound sympathy for those who don’t.

Last meaningful blog of 2015 at The Slog: BBC = Bullied Blackmailed Corrupted

22 thoughts on “EXCLUSIVE: The Slog Old Year Donor’s List leaks

  1. Doctors, Lawyers and Policemen, in no particular order. If you can avoid all contact with the aforementioned professions, you will indeed live a long happy life, however short that might be.

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  2. Comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable!
    Keep on bloggin’
    Thanks John
    Have a healthy and prosperous 2016
    Gerard

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  3. How not very gratifying to see that Sir James Dyson has been recognised for his services to suckers everywhere (and exporting jobs to Malaysia). Happy New Year to John Ward CBE (Committed Bollocks Exterminator) and all readers of this lifeline to sanity.

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  4. May I add my thoughts to those of our illustrious compadre Hieronimusb (above), CBE indeed. No OBE (Other Bugger’s Efforts) here – I raise a glass to Mr. Ward NVE CBE DSC (+scar). God (or any other available deity) guide his pen. Yrs aye, C.

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  5. This is a reminder of the difference between the US and the UK

    Happy New Year John!

    and Dame, Sir , Lady or whatever who really cares?

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  6. Wishing you all a very happy New Year

    “Of what is coming in the New Year I know nothing, except that all that is certain will come like thunderclaps or like comets in the shape of four-leaved clovers, and that all that is unforeseen will appear with the certainty of the sun who every morning shakes a leg in the sky; and of what has gone I know only shilly-shally snatches and freckled plaids, flecks and dabs, dazzle and froth; a simple second caught in coursing snow-light, an instant, gay or sorry, struck motionless in the curve of flight like a bird or a scythe; the spindrift leaf and stray-paper whirl, canter, quarrel, and people-chase of everybody’s street; suddenly the way the grotesque wind slashes and freezes at a corner the clothes of a passer-by so that she stays remembered, cold and still until the world like a night-light in a nursery goes out; and a waddling couple of the small occurrences, comic as ducks, that quack their way through our calamitous days; whits and dots and tittles.”

    (from Dylan’s 1946 BBC broadcast ‘The Crumbs of One Man’s Year’)

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  7. I do believe my last post has gone up alpha center geo soararse. if it has… the shite will fly…hpny. I amenterig a word economy mode for the ny

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  8. Deeply disappointed that the grass does not recognise the civil calendar’s change of year by changing to a randomly chosen colour.

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