A tiger spider (harmless, and quite common here) has spun a web right across my TV screen. That’s how often I watch the telly these days. I’m in no hurry to disturb Stan the Tiger Spider, because he is infinitely more gripping than 99% of the programmes on neoliberal infinite-choice-of-drivel dijitull Merdeschlock satlite. An’ shit.

Yesterday evening, for example, Stanley the Arachnoid tightrope walker zoomed across his web and just missed a bluebottle. The Stürm und Drang tussle – it was over in seconds – was more interesting than watching ten minutes of Smileon Scowl and his guest legumes on Britain’s Gob Talent. Converting that into decimal currency, it was 200 times more engaging than watching 100 minutes of Britain’s Gone Tonto.

So there you have it. Or not, if you don’t get it. And if there’s one chap on the Planet who doesn’t get how to win the Brexit campaign, it’s Faisal Narage, the UKip self-reelected leader who just can’t stop talking about immigration. The unelectable Hairgel Mirage writes in the Telegraph today that “immigration will be the defining issue” of the Brexit campaign, and what’s more – being a jolly switched-on sort of cove – he has the research to back him up: for half of all the latest Ipsos Mori poll respondents say immigration is their Number One fear….whereas utter global econo-fiscal meltdown scores only half of that.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not an immigration fluffy. Like thousands of others, I have tumbled the incoming numbers, worked out the real number of UK unemployed, calculated the square mileage of Britain, projected the UK’s national debt, and concluded that uncontrolled immigration is the policy of the lunatic asylum. But the job of the UKOut campaign is not to reinforce fears: it is to persuade those who remain naive on the real nature of the EU.

At the end of this piece is a link to the Slogpost from earlier today. It concerns four more reasons why Brexit is the only choice for thinking Britons: the target for this dedicated Slog Page is 100 reasons. Trust me, I’ll have no difficulty at all in reaching that target by June 2016.

However, I can only repeat what I’ve said over and over again about Niggle A. Fear: he knows how to bellow, but not how to extend his appeal into the largely apathetic mainstream of the Tory-supporting electorate. And as he hasn’t the first clue about how to engage with Outers across the spectrum, he is once more playing into the Establishment’s hands.

Cue more UKip emails unable to understand my “Nigel problem”.

And finally, in today’s UK Barclays Soccer Premiership, the results were as follows:

Sunkenland 1 Drownedinsea 1   Lesstodo City 1 Totteringham 1   Norich City 1 Stuffed City 1   Bisto Malice 2 Aston Prefab 1.

Palpitating stuff.

Earlier at The Slog: Why David Cameron is the new Neville Chamberlain