This exclusive photogallery of dramatic live as they happened events in the Troika safari to Greece traces the nature of the Eurogroupies red in tooth and claw

schulzgobThe lesser-hirsuted German bearded Schulzstaffel bird calls for concerted action to cull the Varafoukarewe flock of Greek bloodsucking vampire bats

Most natural scientists accept that the Schutzstaffel bird is an evolutionary dead end, largely because of its one-eyed outlook and lack of hearing apparatus.

This would explain why it is President of the European Parliament.


The young pride of specially-bred lions tyrannotroikus eurogropum (below) celebrate following their ambush of Varoufartacus

These three little cuties are called (l to r) Drivelbloke, Dragula and Lowgrade


As serious negotiations get under way, Troika officials (left) examine Greekle Sheeple orifices for evidence of ability to withstand the insertion of their newly developed bazooka-yardbrush search-and-deflower missile range.

Despite Syriza protests that the Sheeple “gave at the orifice already”, it becomes increasingly obvious that rape is inevitable.


Captured by Slog snapper Rabid Daley, this is the dramatic moment when a deranged Schäuble adler swooped to carry off the carcass of Greco economicus.

Greek seagull Varoufartacus Intellectium is clearly visible pecking bravely at the unique rhinocerous skin with which the Schäuble adler is equipped.


Meanwhile, back at Safari HQ the Belgian toad Verhofstadt Energeticus swung into action and quickly showed his economic reform credentials.

Mijnheer Vaseofshit is seen here encouraging the snail Greco economicus, which he declares to be “on the road to recovery now Signor Dragular has stimulated its banking system”.


And so now, the Greek people await the privatisation reforms with some trepidation, zero enthusiasm, and a sense of growing exhaustion.

Our final shot here offers a close-up portrait of the newly-appointed head of Troika privatisations, Omnivore Group senior VP in charge of international monkey-business, Harvey ‘Choppers’ Strippit III.

OK Slog, that’s enough animal gags – Ed.

Last night at The Slog: The Sun, the Queen, yer Labour & a Black Future