WRITING ALOUD: ‘The answer’s yes, now just shut up and consume’

A new series looking at What Next

I posted the other day about the right to say no in today’s global corporatocracy. Below is a screen capture I took this morning while working in gmail:

1optionHP

For those of you who don’t read French, this is Hewlett Packard telling me my guarantee on their poxy stickleback-memory notebook
ran out last February. At the bottom it suggests I should click on an action option. The problem is, there’s just the one option.

Can you guess what it is children?

1optionHP2
The option is to renew my guarantee. There is no second option, and no way to close down the panel.

To annoy the touchscreen,  I tapped the panel 25 times in rapid succession, until at last it told me that my poxy HP pavilion wasn’t responding, and would I like to close the panel. So I pressed close, and then another panel appeared saying they were working on a response so I pressed cancel and – after five minutes of wasted time – it eventually disappeared.

It appears regularly – roughly five times a month. I can’t stop it, I can’t refuse. I am not at liberty to say no. It is an Orwellian panel, and I am not high enough in the Party echelons to be allowed to turn it off. That’s probably also why I didn’t know that Grant Shapps had taken over as Hewlett Packard’s digital marketing director.

Who knows where this will end? Will the day dawn when each morning you try to leave the house, but the door won’t unlock until you’ve been given your shopping list by the Wall-screen that won’t switch off?

Today [23rd Schäubletember 2041] it reads:

‘CONSUMPTION QUOTA AS APPROVED BY GOLDMANAGHI SOCIAL SERVICES FOR CITIZEN EU/SLOG AGITATOR 3rd CLASS 02472269048.

1. NEW PERSONAL SURVEILLANCE CAMERA UPGRADE WITH FREE EXTENSION TO LAVATORY 4,909 DOLLUROS

2. NEW FLAT SCREEN DISPOSABLE DOUBLE HD 3D NEWSCORP CONNECTOR PLUS EUROSOCC SEASON TICKET 78,000 DOLLUROS

3. HANNAN INDUSTRIES FRACKING ENCYCLOPAEDIA MONTHLY BUILDUP MAGAZINE JUST 68 DOLLUROS PER ISSUE OR LIFETIME DEAL 8 MILLION DOLLUROS

4. EBOLA WATER INFECTION FILTER UPGRADE SPECIAL BUY ME OR DIE OFFER 404 DOLLUROS

5. DAILY LUXEJUNCKER ANTI-SYRIZA-TERRORIST CAMPAIGN DONATION 7 DOLLUROS + VAT = 230 DOLLUROS

6. FREEZE-DRIED LEG OF FARM-RAISED DRIZZLEBUM BRAND PODEMOS CLONE, SUITABLE FOR VEGETARIANS 666 DOLLUROS

EURUSSINA DATABASE SHOWS YOU LACK FUNDS FOR COMPLETION FOLLOWING BUNDGILTS-DEUTSCHE BANK BAILIN. TICK PREFERRED CREDIT ALTERNATIVE BELOW.

* Sell primary organ to Jezzahunt Health Services
* Remortgage second grandchild
* 3 months voluntary labour BoJo Holidays (Singapore 2025) Ltd
* OASIS (Osborne Assisted Suicide Insolvency Services) posthumous payment

***** WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO MAKE THIS CHOICE FOR YOU WITHOUT NOTICE.

——

PS Just as I was about to post, the Hewlett Panel came back again

Yesterday at The Slog: All the whys & wherefores of Lagarde v Schäuble

21 thoughts on “WRITING ALOUD: ‘The answer’s yes, now just shut up and consume’

  1. Will the day dawn when each morning you try to leave the house, but the door won’t unlock until

    Already happening to 1,600,000 Palestinians jailed in Gaza

    The Jerusalem Sanherdin, comprised of 71 sages. is putting Pope Francis on trial!

    “We require from you an apology for your recognizing as a nation those who stole the land, those who are known as the Palestinian Authority, and we are informing the Vatican that the sole God given right to the land of Israel is to the Nation of Israel. If His Honor the Pope, and the Vatican, do not apologize within two weeks of receiving this letter, and if he does not change his ways, we shall judge these actions in the Court of Mount Zion,

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  2. The truth is that most digital devices are now simply conduits for revenue.

    The woeful mess that windows now represents is due to the fact that M$ sat on their hands thinking their business model was immortal. Apple and Google broke M$ by creating the ‘app’ culture, a drip feed approach to purchasing where instead of buying an operating system for £150 you give it away and then charge for all the little bits.

    Everyone is on the bandwagon, the Apple appstore, Google play, Amazon prime with its FIRE TV etc.

    The hardware is now simply a trojan backdoor entry route into your life, of course it is no good unless you keep people buying on regular basis which is why everything is built to be obsolete after 10 minutes.

    Moving away from this dependency is somewhat akin to living within your means after being a credit junkie, you have to be smarter, leaner and more willing to solve issues for yourself but the result is a stronger, fitter digital existence..

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  3. LOL well said John! I booted my Win 7 Pro PC this morning, following an updates install on shutdown yesterday evening. The reboot this morning took what seemed like an eon consisting of several please wait installation screens and 3 (I began to lose count) restarts. WTF?!

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  4. Beam me up, Scottie….it’s all becoming Too Much….Just off the phone with South West Water, who needed Nanny, aged 100 and registered blind to sign their form…”But, she’s BLIND!”….”Well, she HAS to sign it, data protection etc…..sorry….” “Do you know what BLIND means??” “Well, if she could just put a line on the paper…” “But she can’t SEE THE PAPER!”

    OyFookingVEY!!!!!!!!

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  5. Lizzie

    At least she’s got water. I also live in SW. On a clear day over Neath you can see chemtrails criss-crossing the sky, 50-100 every single day. We are so lucky they don’t bomb hospitals!

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  6. Some things are worth buying like a deep lifting,stainless steel hand pump for the well and other crash2 supplies.

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  7. Yes, and the ‘App culture’ drives me to distraction… the look as if designed by a ten year old – for a ten year old.

    DavidC

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  8. boncourage,
    I’m sorry but you’ve got one of my real bugbears there – they’re NOT installs, they’re INSTALLATIONS. The use of the bare infinitive really annoys me. INVITATIONS, NOT invites, INSTALLATIONS, NOT invites. Etc.

    DavidC

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  9. Lizzie,
    There’s a word I’m using more and more these days to describe these idiots (and a lot of them are in the financial elite) – namely f***wits – I’ll leave you to fill in the asterisks.

    DavidC

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  10. Well, I guess that if that’s one of your worst bugbears, you’re not doing that badly! I did actually use both so, only half a bugbear perhaps? ;o)

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  11. same here in mayo. despicable disgusting f$cking lowlife. saw one last night go from a fine trail to miles wide in about an hour.there is now one irish government minister speaking up about it, but dont hold your breath, hes a politician?

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  12. My trusted computer man, Simon, put me back to windows 7, & installed AVG free, judging that sufficient.
    Trusting AVG, I installed a tune-up, which has slowed my PC to almost glacial performance.
    Of course I now have screens which cannot be deleted offering to cure this problem.
    GGGRRRUURRHHH.

    The Hegelian tictac yet again: problem, reaction, solution.
    Create the problem.
    Await the reaction.
    Step forward with the solution.

    The old ones are the best.
    SIMON…

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  13. At the risk of getting banned… Some Sloggers might find this useful, and I am certainly not advocating its use for Mr. Ward as he has made his position on this clear in the past.

    I have had no trouble from the TAILS operating system. The default is to not allow any access to the hard drive of the p.c. I boot from a USB stick when I want to email or surf the web as any nasties I accidentally pick up from the big bad virtual world are wiped out when I close down that session. Anything interesting I want to hold on to I either save on a second USB drive, or in the password-protected ‘persistent’ volume on the main USB. When I must use Windows, (some websites won’t allow access via Tor, or sometimes I am forced to use Word or Excel), I simply remove the USB stick and boot up. I have had several years of trouble-free browsing in this way. (Touch wood.) I should add that before finding TAILS I knew nothing about Linux or anything about computers beyond the use of Windows for Word Processing, Spreadsheets and web surfing. I should add (and I’m sure the more knowlegeable Sloggers will have much to say on the issue), that I have no background in computing.

    There may very well be many flaws in the TAILS system, but I have yet to encounter them. I find it convenient and have some reassurance that I am not damaging data on the hard drive when I surf.

    https://tails.boum.org/

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  14. I know you hate people giving you technical advice on such matters but there is potentially a permanent fix that only takes a minute:

    With Windows running hold down the Windows key and press R. In the Run box that appears type “msconfig” (without quotes) and hit enter. In the System Configuration window that opens, click the Start up tab and look for an entry tittled ‘HP Total Care Advisor’ or similar – if this is listed, remove the tick in the box next to it and then click Apply and OK. You may find that instead of a list under the Start Up tab you only have the option to “open Task Scheduler”. If this is the case clicking on it will open the list.

    I say it is a potential fix because HP have run this irritating scam for years and do try to change things around as time passes and the ‘fix’ gets too widely circulated for their taste so that you need to do something a little different in order to get rid of it.

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  15. While not condoning for one second the ****wits who design these things and completely take your point, I got rid of similar by:

    1. Click Start
    2. In search type Task Scheduler or Scheduled Tasks
    3. In the left column click Task Scheduler Library
    4. Select the bugger you want to stop (should be able to spot it)
    5. In the right column click Delete

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  16. Well I won’t mention the” L” word for fear of being exiled again other than to agree with Canexpat. I use Tails from time to time and in the same way. I also use other live systems (as recommended by the German govt) for banking, online purchasing etc as some sites won’t accept access from anonymizing networks. My current system has Addblocker Plus and NoScript installed and fuctioning by default so never bothered by pesky pop-ups. Have not paid for any anti vrus for about 15 years. I am also no expert and far from it.

    Our host Mr JW could consider installing Add-blocker and No Script as I believe there are versions for Win. Would **ss them off though.

    Like

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