The Slog celebrates by spotting seven loads of old bollocks in 34 minutes

Banned incessantly, turned off twice, and trolled to extremes, today Your Soaraway Slog makes it to 3000 posts.

You can get the potted history of highlights and headlights at the newly created page SLOG AT 3000  but as it’s always a shame to waste an upload on mere trumpet-blowing, here’s a small selection of today’s more obvious deception and distortion…aka, bollocks:

• Newscorp says it showed us (hands over) Harry’s willy to ‘give our readers a chance to see it’. But that meant they had to pay Roop: whereas on the internet, they could see it for free. Sort of sums up the gaping hole in your business model there, Roop. And, of course, your ethical logic…but then we always knew about that one.

• Security firm G4S says the contract to provide security for the London 2012 Olympic Games has cost it £50m (BBC). But it still made £61m at the last count….and has just been awarded the contract to hunt for Iraq squaddie wickedness. And got paid in full by Locog. Smelleeeee.

• Crude oil market adequately supplied, has adjusted to loss of Iranian supply (Reuters). It was never under-supplied. This was just a bid for more black crude from the Black Dude, in order to get the pumps price down. Screw the truth – let’s get elected here, guys!

• Spain sells €1.67B of 3-month debt at average yields of 0.95%, well below the 2.43% it paid in July. And blow me down, yields also fall in an Italian bond auction. The Treasury sells €3B of 2-year bonds at a yield of 3.06%, down from 4.86% last month. (Seeking Alpha). Er…Spain is to get a bailout, and Mario needs some new bond-wallpaper for his office: he’s tired of the Euros pattern.

• Eurozone private-sector loans from financial institutions +0.1% in July vs. -0.2% in June. (ECB) Or put another way, still almost nothing.

• Greek government signs €330m settlement with Siemens. (Telegraph) But must still carry on and pay the £150bn it was gently pushed into paying for Franco-German arms…including a submarine it bought twice. Ausgezeichnet!

• Banking revolution planned for high street. (Telegraph) Er…this is one report from Boston Consulting Group. Nobody has signed up to it. See that pie, see that sky, see that air, observe those castles.
That compilation took me precisely 34 minutes to compile. Bollocks deconstruction is the UK’s fastest-growing market sector, with unlimited potential. It is the shale gas of online journalism.
Thanks for your support thus far. Keep spreading the word, and keep sending me your stories, bollocks observations and bent-folks bananas to