Hackileaks founder granted political asylum in Alex Salmond

Caught post-coitally napping, Rupert Assange in all his naked glory – a man working tirelessly to ensure freedom to put paywalls around everything, nurture well fed and well paid policemen for a safer society, give an Emperor’s role to Slippery Salmond, and open a squeaky-clean tabloid shower where all the Nobs can hang out discreetly.

From the text below last Friday’s knob-shots:

‘The Sun is NOT making any moral judgement about Harry’s nude frolics with girls in a Las Vegas hotel. Far from it. He often sails close to the wind for a Royal — but he’s 27, single and a soldier. We like him. We are publishing the photos because we think Sun readers have a right to see them.’

Altagevva nar….


Perched on the bell-end of Alex Salmond’s engorged penis, Mr Assange addressed a crowd of well-wishers with these well chosen words:

“That fackin Leveson can go fack off an’ so can anyone else who tries ter mess wimme human roit to run the fackin world or any fackin ‘eadline oi feel like rannin’ or any fackin royal dick I wanna snap yer fackin toffeenosed Pom bastards ah fackin hate all o’ yer and long live bonnie Scotland hootsmate issa fackin braw nicht the noo G’day. There is nar such thing as cant in moi dicshunree yer fackin stuck up Oxbridge cants.”

And as a taster of press freedom to come, today’s lead story at the Sun’s website: