Team GB’s richly deserved success: Boris follows the medals.

It may not be getting any better on the ground in the Olympic Village, but on track, field and river, Team GB have done us all proud. A quite incredible performance. And there’s nothing quicker to burrow into a successful animal than the politician. Once again, BoJo has shown that he is indeed the man who put the tic into politician.

Last night, an effusive Mayor of London said: “Team GB’s gluttonous desire for gold shows no sign of being sated. Their extraordinary efforts have brought rapture to streets, parks and living rooms in London and all over the country if not the planet. It has been a remarkable first week and my hearty congratulations go to every single athlete that has taken part. They have entertained billions of people around the world and I for one cannot wait to see what they serve up for week two.”

PS And just look how quickly everyone’s forgotten all the cockups, the graft, and the ruination of London’s retail economy.

Meanwhile, the chief executive of Coca-Cola has defended the role of Olympic sponsors, saying that without them the Games would not be anything like as ‘rich’ an event. This gentleman could live to 170 and never get the Olympic ideal. If we banned professionalism – and went back to sponsoring the athletes not ‘the event’ – the event would be all the richer for it. The CEO of coke doesn’t care a fig for the Olympics, fitness or health, as the guy is marketing a drink made from sh*t. And judging by feedback from the real fans, his staff know very little about planned mass catering.

One further note, by the way. BBC interviewers have come under much criticism thanks to the predictable prattle that surrounds the “give us your reaction” bollocks thirty seconds after somebody has achieved the pinnacle of their career. Yes, alright – the questions are asinine. But once again we must remind ourselves that we are dealing with athletes here, not the Oscar Wilde & Noel Coward Appreciation Society.

Firewheels Wiggins has the correct approach: he says he isn’t a robot, has no interest in undergoing media training, and if people don’t like it they can knob off. It’s one of the biggest reasons why he is such a hero in France: ‘le straight-talk gentleman’ as he is known over here. Excellent.

I did a little audit of last night’s post-win Olympic interviews. The phrase “I’ve/you’ve worked so hard for this” came up 29 times in a little over 50 minutes between roughly 8.40 pm BST and 9.30. “I’d like to thank/pay tribute to my team/my parents” was heard 14 times. But the runaway winner was “How are you feeling right now/at this moment?” with 44 mentions.

Wimbledon did, I think, at one time have the right idea on this: talk to the competitors later when they’ve had time to think and talk sensibly about their performances. Now they too thrust a mic under Murray’s nose as he blubs. But it’s what the viewers want, and what the viewers want goes, because what the sponsors and advertisers want is viewers.

However, Sir Redgrave God bless ‘im still holds the lifetime Gold for best interview when, five seconds after he won a fourth rowing gold and pulled his craft over to the side, some media pillock asked for his reaction, live.

“If I ever sound like I might do this again,” he puffed, “F**kin’ shoot me”.



48 thoughts on “Team GB’s richly deserved success: Boris follows the medals.

  1. JW,

    I guess ‘lefties’ would say UK’s success is a vindication for ‘multiculturism’ (Ennis and Farah) but ‘immigrant haters’ would say they are vindicated by Sturridge missing a penalty (although being the team’s top scorer).

    Boris’ poor Churchill impersonations are boring are they not.


  2. Ah, so BoJo is directly responsible for all the problems of the Olympics, but can’t bask in any of the glory. I suppose if we hadn’t won so many medals, that would be his fault too?

    Chalk up another post to the JW ‘I can’t stand Old Etonians’ bias.


  3. Coca Cola have the cheek of the devil to try to take the glory for what these sports men and women have done.
    I had to switch off the tacky opening pagent, but have been watching the actual events – that is what the Olympics is supposed to be about.
    If anything, Coca Cola and Macdonalds and the other Corporate Sponsors bullying behaviour almost put me off watching any of these events.


  4. Does anybody doubt that if Blair was still running the show, he’d also be basking in the glory? It would be nick-named Blair’s Olympic Games.
    This is what politicians do. If Britain’s medal performance continues like this, the poor arrangements will be forgotten about and it’ll just be left for the taxpayer to pick up the bottom line tabs.


  5. ******BREAKING NEWS***********

    LONDON 5th Aug 2012

    News is filtering through from his secret French bolt hole that terminally grumpy blogger, John Ward, has shown some initial signs of coming round to the view of the vast majority of those members of the public actually residing within 300 miles of London, England and started to enjoy the least important aspect of the 2012 Olympic Games, colloquially known as “Sport”.

    Be aware, the situation is vague and could still reverse at any time as Mr Ward has so far been able to substantiate his pre-games predictions of total Armageddon with quotes of unquestionable integrity from such luminous commentators as “Harris Mooney” of the Vancouver Sun, some dolly from the Indian Archery Association and his mate who had to queue up for a coffee at a sporting event that was catering for 200,000 people in a single day.

    (We won’t mention the fact that Mr Ward could have dug a little less deep into the Vancouver Sun’s website and used it as a source for the following quotes:

    “London has been amazing. They are doing such a great job moving people around and the volunteers are so friendly. Totally awesome.” – Brittany and Heather MacLean, Team Canada Swimmers who are actually at the very centre of it all.


    “Toronto resident Hana Becka hails the “amazing atmosphere” at the London Olympics”

    or even maybe quoted the winner of the most medals in history when Michael Phelps described the city and the people as “Great” and the Olympic Village as “Awesome”.)

    Further updates to follow.

    ******BREAKING NEWS***********


  6. Jim,
    Are you seriously suggesting Boris has had any personal input into any/all the success of the UK athletes?

    I am having problems visualising Boris demonstrating the Frosby flop or some of the gym exercises!

    Off topic has anyone else wondered how our ‘we are not on holiday’ MP’s and especially PM have so much spare time to be at the Olympics (do they get free tickets as well).

    I have mused how many MP’s have rented out their London pads, paid for by us, for lucrative Olympic rentals.

    Envy is bad, envy is …


  7. Obviously Michael Phelps and the other people you quote are subject to Control Files and will say whatever they’re told to say… ;-)


  8. I ‘suffered’ half an hour of the BBC News Channel last night, and the highest scoring quotation from the BBC Journos was “Errrrr..” with a score of zillions. Can’t they do better than this? Err, p’raps not.


  9. Boris is clever in his use of language. He uses words like “sated”, which are known and perhaps understood in context by many, yet not commonly used. He reminds me of that dreadful man Col Tim Spicer who the press lapped up. He would drop in references to Greek mythology, again nothing esoteric (sic), but just enough to make the listener feel a bit smug.

    If the UK elects Boris PM then everything the critics of the UK education system have been banging on about is correct.


  10. This is one viewer who most certainly does not want “instant” reactions from knackered but joyous competitors who can barely catch their breath.
    I particularly dislike the “so what went wrong” approach. The obvious answer is “I didn’t f***ing well win, that’s what went wrong”. Full marks to Mark Cavendish for asking the idiot interviewer if he knew anything about cycling.
    The commentary on the Double Trap was particularly wonderful, being along the linesof “if he keeps hiting the targets, he’ll win”. Wellwho’d have thunk it-except thats the entire point-its bloody difficult to keep on hitting them (as I know from experience).
    And yes, I thought the whole thing had every chance of being an organisational cock-up. I am more than happy to have been proved wrong. It is, however, true that London is very, very quiet-which wasn’t quite the idea but the presentation of London on TV has been good, so presumably there will be positive things from that for the future.


  11. The merely noted how much more thrilling was the action in the main Olympic stadium, as compared to the limp lettuce dished up on BBC3 from Cardiff.

    Ironic, is it not, that Team GB does crappest at the most lavishly-funded sport?


  12. It was especially patronising to see the guy who beat cavendish asked what he thought about how it went wrong for the British team.

    The look on his face said it all.

    Note to the BBC: Perhaps when the Brits lose it isn’t because “it all went wrong”, maybe it’s because someone else did it better.


  13. And yet, if you read the btl comments on news websites from foreign viewers you will see that they all recommend wholeheartedly the BBC coverage as being the best available in any country.


  14. I’m watching it at the moment, with appalled horror. How long, I wonder, before competitive ‘sign language for the deaf’ is introduced ?


  15. This weekend the Olympics entered a special phase.

    I’d compare it to the imbecility in the aftermath of Diana’s death, the wave of anti-Americanism that swept the UK just after 911 and the sanctimony and grovelling over Wills and Kate’s wedding and Queen’s jubilee.

    It really is groupthink at its most visible. And most contemptible.

    Just as an aside, one thing that connects all of those things is the momentum given to them by the BBC, which shows the power of the mainstream media.

    To the Royal grievers and lovers and the Olympic worshippers: if you liked it that much you’d put your money where your mouth is and volunteer to pay for the whole circus yourself.

    But you’ll never volunteer to do that. You’ll just pretend everyone is ‘up for this’.

    It’s always the purse as tells the truth.

    Funny how you want others to pay for your imbecility.


  16. That’s not uncommon among people abroad. A lot of Americans swear by the BBC (especially major news stories), believing it to be neutral against their own biased media. That the BBC is the British Establishment’s PC propaganda mouthpice is not aware to them.


  17. The BBC is more biased than any American media outlet. It is stuffed to the doors with the Labour Party and presents a relentless left-wing view in news, current affairs and drama. Of course it spends a vast amount of its time telling all and sundry that it is ‘neutral’, non aligned etc. All a load of bollocks of course.


  18. Note to BBC TV Sport.

    For an example of how to conduct unbiased, non-jingoistic sports broadcasting, check out your own BBC Radio Test Match Special – simple reporting, hugely entertaining, giving praise and brickbats where they’re due.


  19. No, I’m just trying to point out that JW seems hell bent on blaming BoJo for everything that is wrong about the games (over commercialisation, censorship, poor admin, adverse economic effect on London etc etc) but also to berate him for basking in a bit of the glory. If BoJo is to blame for all the faults, surely he must be able to lay claim to some of the successes too?

    Or more accurately he’s only really a figurehead, he’s not responsible for all the decisions taken, most of them under a previous government, and he’s obviously not responsible for any of the athletes successes either.

    Which is far more prosaic than the ‘Its all the fault of the Old Etonians’ line that JW seems to take at every possible opportunity.


  20. Andy Murray in straight sets over none other than Roger Federer?!!

    Good gracious what a spirit must be reigning over ya’ll !

    Congratulations Andy and all Team GB.


  21. They did it again in the 400 womens heats asking the winner about Christine Ohouruogu and asking how she felt about beating her, as if the winner cared.


  22. “there’s nothing quicker to burrow into a successful animal than the politician. Once again, BoJo has shown that he is indeed the man who put the tic into politician.”

    What a cracker. The motion is passed. Then carried around the O’Limppick Staidium on a celebratory lap. The audience is rabid, and laps it up… need I say more?


  23. But think of it as a premium one could slap on top of an IPO. The promoters would be laughing all the way to the bank.


  24. I honestly think I have not encountered the old phrase ‘mass psychosis’ in anything I’ve read or heard this last 20 years. Has it all been eradicated like smallpox by simple inoculation with Pomo?


  25. “the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist”

    Sorry, couldn’t resist!


  26. Ask his bank account.

    There’s a lot more gold in the Wimbledon trophy, both literally and figuratively!


  27. I’m not sure there was anti-American feeling by the UK after 9/11. I certainly didn’t have any, nor do I know people who did. Our “pundits” said “they had it coming” (step forward Mary Beard, I think-even tho’ she can’t take barbs from A A Gill) but my own feeling was one of horror. Our media experts/government are not the British people-any more than Dubya was the American people.
    The Diana thing was also a media hype-and the easily led went along with it. Most just wondered what the hell it was all about.
    Incidentally, with regard to the Royal family, my own view (shared by others, I think) is that I’m paying for the show so I’ll watch (and criticise) it. If I was allowed to opt out, I would-but I’m not.


  28. Ask Federer which he would have preferred. With all his Wimbledon titles he might have swapped one for an Olympic gold. It is unlikely he will now win one of those.


  29. It’s true. Sadly, nothing on this God’s earth will ever beat the masochism of the Brits.

    They the the Royals dump on them, they let Islamic terrorists dump on them (HSBC and so on – the de facto sponsors of so much Islamic terror operate in its City of London).

    And now, with the economy on its knees they let Sebastian Coe use his judo skills to apply the donkey punch to it, just so him and his mates can fill their Coca-Cola boots. He’s breaking your spinal cord, for Christ’s sake. And you applaud?

    The whole thing fills me with despair. It reminds me of that dreadful scene at the end of Boys From The Black Stuff when Julie Walters cries out: “Fight back you &a$£ard. Fight back.”

    That’s all they need to show for the closing ceremony. Two seconds on the giant screens of that.

    Why can’t people see these Olympic Games for what they are? Bread and circuses. It’s about their contempt at the top for you.

    Snap out of it, Britain.


  30. @Robert: I don’t think so. Federer is on record saying he wants to equal or beat Wimbledon’s all time champion: Pete Sampras :-)


  31. QUOTE “Are you seriously suggesting Boris has had any personal input into any/all the success of the UK athletes”?

    The man can fly with out wings… he also signs cheques for ‘struggling Africans’ to come over and run fast, ON our behalf. Respek man where be yo respek man!
    I am sure someone filmed him walking across the river Thames… on high tide day…


  32. There will be… and coke yer cola will be held above water to prove without it, the swimmers would surely drown!!


  33. Did you notice he didn’t have a Team GB logo on his top? ..and when no one was looking he bit into the medal just to make sure….yah never know. My fear is the Team GB will be asked to hand back the medals to be melted down to help finance the sorry show. Kate is wearing nice dresses with comfortable shoes.


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