CRASH 2: As ClubMeds break ranks to look for US help, Van Rompuy & Barroso teach G20 how to suck eggs

Comedy duo Barro & Gall

Eurocrats, acrobats, and wombats

“Once the markets get over the joy of not being dead, they will call last Thursday’s [EU] deal into question,” said an Iberian based credit manager last night, “In fact, it’s already happening. Trichet says he wants swift action, but action to do what – beg the Chinese on bended knees? Make the Italian crisis disappear? It doesn’t get any better. But it will get a lot worse.”

Totting up the eurobollocks saga in Tenerife airport yesterday, I made last week’s non-event the 14th crisis summit in 21 months. The Slog exposed the complete lack of content within twelve hours, but this was hardly an exclusive: most respected financial sites (and Sloggers, based on the comment thread) saw it for what it was: desperate spin. (The FT, predictably, didn’t…the one exception as always being Wolfgang Munchau).

News has been seeping out from several sources over the last 24 hours that even some of the ClubMeds are convinced the main players in Crash 2 are clueless. They are putting out independent feelers to American government officials and senior banking executives that they could all go bust before Brussels gets anywhere near to a solution.

“They’re dumb to be doing this,” a Washington source observed yesterday, “because it shows all their cards to the market. But yes, they did put out feelers at the G20 – and not always discreetly. It just confirms what most thinking Americans feel – that it’s spiralling into anarchy over there.”

Wall Street rarely behaves like thinking America, but the Journal also confirmed in a couple of pieces yesterday that the Street of Shame had, after its euphoria at the latest 1938 Munich Agreement, worked out that Nazi troops were still massing on the Czech border. So the latest staggering piece of pompous rubbish from Rompuy & Barroso has not been playing well among those preparing to attend yet another G20 summit this week.

European Council President Herman Van Rompuy and European Commission President José Manuel Barroso boasted (in a letter to G20 delegates yesterday) that the decisions made at last week’s euro-crisis summit were ‘the kind of coordinated action needed to help revive the world economy. The EU’s contribution to Cannes [G20] is the above-mentioned package to ensure the stability of the euro area. But more needs to be done at the global level.’

The utterance of this kind of chocolate soldier Ruritanian breast-thumping hubris is simply another example of why the pathetic Camerlot talk about EU reform will  run out of credibility very soon. These two complete chumps are unelected, one a former Communist and the other a man who helped Belgium on its way to implosion…in between writing execrable Japanese poetry. A commercial entity wouldn’t trust them with managing  the Christmas Party. Yet here they are, telling the G20 how things should be done.

The other member of the standard Trio of Tosh, Christine Lagarde of the IMF, appears to have had her mouth sewn up. She last gave out a peep on Sunday 23rd, to tell the assembled press, “We’ve done some good work today. It’s real progress…..we’re heading in the right direction.” This of course turned out to be bollocks; but being pro-American by training and profession, she does at least know when to find a dark corner and hide. The other two clowns gaily stick out the glass chin, but the last thing they expect is for somebody joyously to break it.

Meanwhile, keep your eye on Mario Draghi: as the Slog predicted some time ago, he could yet turn out to be The Man who did Something Useful. If you follow the latter link, you’ll see that (as a Slog source asserted recently) he is good at being all things discreet to all people. I suspect this is what the EU needs more than anything at the minute.

The lighter view is at The Big Top

Some of the thinking behind The Slog

26 thoughts on “CRASH 2: As ClubMeds break ranks to look for US help, Van Rompuy & Barroso teach G20 how to suck eggs

  1. By the time you read this, you will be back in England. Welcome home!

    As to the Christmas party – have you any idea just how important these affairs are? After all, it is the one time of the year that bankers can drink free wine and get free meals.

    … or am I missing something?


  2. You may like to know that the Chinese for “Don’t teach your grandmother to suck eggs” is (I don’t think the characters will work here, so I’ll put it in Pinyin) “Ban men nong fu” – “Dont chop wood outside Lu Ban’s door”
    (need recourse to Wikipedia at this point):

    I have had the pleasure of hearing this said to a visiting Big Shot in Beijing – the interpreter elided it.


  3. The Chinese are certainly capable of the most wonderful put downs of the earnest western visitor and the role of the interpreter in keeping the meeting ontrack is essential. I was once in a meeting with a Chinese prime Minister and he was extolling the virtues of the ‘social market economy’, the interpreter, who had been educated at the University of Wales, said offhandedly with a wink, ignore the social. Apparently, he did not suffer professionally. He was soon in a senior position at the IMF.


  4. I am sure Mario Draghi is a very capalable politician, very smart and streetwise but, how is this one man going to stop the tsunami? After all look at the chumps he is up against!


  5. This came onto my computer ,28 October.’Subject:Tension in Tenerife. Last and final attempt to get this f**kwitted mail system to work,after which I give up……


  6. You rightly draw attention to the Two EU Stooges (Van Rompuy and Barroso), a finer pair of idiots being difficult to imagine, but there is a third, even more inept, EU Stooge viz Baroness Ashton.

    The Sunday Times (behind the pay-wall) has an expose of her trip to the Commonwealth heads of government meeting. She attended for a single day before resuming what appears to be an expenses paid holiday and shopping trip.

    EU chief’s 5-star faux pas


  7. I can’t imagine what help the US can offer to the EU. It’s also bankrupt with even more noughts on their debts.


  8. I am sure Mario Draghi is a very capable politician, very smart and streetwise but, how is this one man going to stop the tsunami? After all look at the chumps he is up against!


  9. Well, I must agree that Barroso and van Rompuy are not the best representatives to promote the new improved EFSF but there is a dearth of talent around Europe to promote anything apart from how to bankrupt your economy in one easy lesson.

    Mind you, they do have a nerve in putting the European begging bowl under the noses of the Chinese, Indians, Brazilians et al. Just does not seem to be a pretty picture for Mr and Mrs. Wang or Chatterjee to see how desperately the Italians are struggling while ordering 19 new Maserati Quattroportes for those poor impoverished Italian worthies to swan around in!


  10. We must always remember Marcus Cicero’s quote that “Politicians are not born. They are excreted.” This observation is probably even more accurate today than it was in early civilisation.


  11. “one a former Communist”

    A Maoist, to be precise. Former? Hmmmmm. Can you believe it?
    (As an aside, DSK is/was a Marxist. Find the Trotskyist, the Spartacist and the former IS member from that bunch of ghouls that is the EU (& IMF), and you have a full hand.


  12. Indeed. From Wiki:
    “In his college days, he [Barroso] was one of the leaders of the underground Maoist MRPP (Reorganising Movement of the Proletariat Party, later PCTP/MRPP, Communist Party of the Portuguese Workers/Revolutionary Movement of the Portuguese Proletariat).”


  13. “Trichet says he wants swift action, but action to do what – beg the Chinese on bended knees?”

    Hey, fellow Sloggers, talk about having a flashback – around 40 years or so. I suddenly recalled having had a good chuckle at an image in “Penthouse” at the time of the first oil crisis in the early `70s; it was itself within an ongoing cartoon series about the erotic adventures of a dark-haired vixen called Wanda and her blonde girlfriend.

    Anyway, the image that flashed up was the one presented of Nixon and Kissinger skulking around an Arab encampment with 20 liter jerrycans in each hand and intent on scrounging some oil from somebody, anybody.

    The update, for any artists out there, would thus be one of Mao Barrosso and Dozy Hermann skulking amongst the pagodas with an emperor-size begging bowl.

    Somehow though, I can’t really imagine that Barrosso’s former strict adherence to the political views of Mao-Zhedong (or however it is spelt these days) is going to give him many Brownie points in Beijing, if any.

    As for ferret-faced Hermann; the Chinks still don’t like the Nips, particularly their refusal to acknowledge responsibility for the Rape of Nanking, so they are likely to be highly chuffed with having a Belgian in their midst that tries to write Japanese poetry.


  14. Im going to log on to youtube next and watch Nigel Farage tear into these two idiots once again! The way NF makes old Van Rompuy squirm is a joy to behold.


  15. So , the Euroelite ,Barroso,Van Rompuy and Deadly Sex Kitten are all past or present believers in the world’s most unsuccessful religion, Marxism/Maoism? What about our home grown trio,Pavlov,the Trafalgar day boy,a youth member of the Young Communists,the founder of the Havana 3,his converts,Garry,who fooled MI6 by taking his holidays in the US,and then,MarK,who brazenly studied at the high altar of Moscow College, Cambridge,before talking himself into a position to destroy the ENTIRE economy by recreating the dragon of inflation.If you think the Eurozone is strong on crypto commies,have a good look closer to home.


  16. Tuesday is Melbourne Cup Day (horse race), European horses are favoured to win. I’ll leave that at that …. :)


  17. Well, the US wins the prize for being the king of money printers (plus 1-2 others who also print dollars unofficially: eg Iran), but the ECB has also been expanding the euro money supply since it was first introduced.
    Perhaps the Americans have sold the ECB a super-high-speed printing system which can print euros on lavatory paper? ;-)


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