Scottish voters were rocked to the core tonight by the news that a new IndyRef poll from YouWuff showed the No campaign 30 points ahead among Scottish deerhounds, with 90% of West Highland terriers undecided. “Once again, this shows our short-term economic desperation strategy is working” said a kilted Davie McCameron, flanked by his Cairn terrier, Border Collie and Shetland sheepdog pets outside the Scottish Assembly building.
And in another blow for the Yes campaign, 73% of anti-aircraft gunners in the Ukraine said they would shoot down any Loganair planes shown to have secessionist pilots at the controls.
As the momentum built towards a 100% rejection of the neo-fascist racism of Alec Salmond and his reactionary running-dog Wee Scotlanders, leaders across the globe condemned the irresponsible self-determination of piss-head Jock vandals.
“These guys are clearly linked to the barbarian Lockerbie bombers”, averred Senator John McCain as he took time out from vetting Syrian rebels to insist that “a Yes vote would without question send a message to extremists everywhere that they would find a safe haven in Dundee”.
Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott also expressed “dismay” at the selfish determination of the Scots, calling upon his compatriots to “Git arver theer roit an’ knock sem sinse inter them feckin’ dingos”.
Meanwhile, the BBC leads with a story tonight from ace cub reporter Nick Robinson to the effect that Alec Salmond is a pervert hell-bent on creating the world’s first independent paedophile Taliban concentration camp.
The Slog 