Multicultural fighter for press freedoms caught in sex-romp with naked admirers: exclusive photo.

Hackileaks founder granted political asylum in Alex Salmond

Caught post-coitally napping, Rupert Assange in all his naked glory – a man working tirelessly to ensure freedom to put paywalls around everything, nurture well fed and well paid policemen for a safer society, give an Emperor’s role to Slippery Salmond, and open a squeaky-clean tabloid shower where all the Nobs can hang out discreetly.

From the text below last Friday’s knob-shots:

‘The Sun is NOT making any moral judgement about Harry’s nude frolics with girls in a Las Vegas hotel. Far from it. He often sails close to the wind for a Royal — but he’s 27, single and a soldier. We like him. We are publishing the photos because we think Sun readers have a right to see them.’

Altagevva nar….

Huuuuuuwweeeeee

Perched on the bell-end of Alex Salmond’s engorged penis, Mr Assange addressed a crowd of well-wishers with these well chosen words:

“That fackin Leveson can go fack off an’ so can anyone else who tries ter mess wimme human roit to run the fackin world or any fackin ‘eadline oi feel like rannin’ or any fackin royal dick I wanna snap yer fackin toffeenosed Pom bastards ah fackin hate all o’ yer and long live bonnie Scotland hootsmate issa fackin braw nicht the noo G’day. There is nar such thing as cant in moi dicshunree yer fackin stuck up Oxbridge cants.”

And as a taster of press freedom to come, today’s lead story at the Sun’s website:

I HAVE A HUNDRED ORGASMS A DAY SAYS NURSE KIM, 44

13 thoughts on “Multicultural fighter for press freedoms caught in sex-romp with naked admirers: exclusive photo.

  1. Good grief :-)

    “Sit down for a moment, my dear. Manningham – would you be good enough to fetch Madam her smelling salts? .. She appears to have fainted quite away”.

    Best laugh of the day thus far, John. Thank ‘ee

  2. That’s the stuff to give the troops. I, for one, think that your writing is Great (with a capital gee!).

    Please John could I have some more posts from the good Dr. Fuller. He hasn’t written for awhile. I guess I’ll get trolled with “thank God for that” comments but what the hell.

    Nice work.

  3. “These lyrics are in Scots”:
    Wi’ a hundred orgasms, an’ a’, an’ a’,
    Wi’ a hundred orgasms, an’ a’, an’ a’,
    We’ll up an’ gie them a blaw, a blaw
    Wi’ a hundred orgasms, an’ a’, an’ a’.
    O it’s owre the G-spot awa’, awa’
    It’s owre the G-spot awa’, awa’
    We’ll on an’ we’ll march to Venus ha’
    Wi’ its muff, its diving an’ a’, an a’.

  4. Oh dear someones upset your precious royals…well let them pay back every penny the tax payer gives them then they’ll deserve to be left alone, until then let the mob have their fill I say…

    • In my young day, the prince’s behaviour would, at least, have warranted a stand up chat (minus coffee) with the CO. But I freely confess to having sniggered a bit at the Daily Wail’s headline about “… sources claim there’s ‘something pretty gigantic’ still to come out (about Vegas trip) …”.

      Are we to assume that the ambient temperature was considerably more than that of the showers at Ludgrove?

  5. Glad to have you back John. I have no idea what happened earlier when I tried to access this site – I was redirected?
    ah well. anyway, 100 orgasms per day is quite a lot- not a man in sight eh? lololololol.

    I think the ‘gigantic news’ will be of Prince HARRY having a sexual encounter? Phew, god no, Please. I wanted him to remain a virgin untill he marries a gentle,well dressed upper class Lady ( also virginal)..his name sake Henry :8th was also a ‘bit of a lad’ by all accounts.

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